The Greek Ministry of Rural Development and Food has designated the entire island of Syros as a National Feline Welfare Training Ground, ordering every civil servant in the country to complete five hours of daily cat-care duty before receiving their monthly pay. The measure, announced Monday from a converted ferry terminal on the island, takes effect immediately for all 680,000 state employees.
«We have calculated that if each public worker feeds, waters and medicates the island's abandoned cats for five hours a day, the feline population will achieve full employment within eighteen months,» said Deputy Minister for Animal Affairs Thanasis Mavridis, speaking beside a stack of stainless-steel feeding bowls taller than the town hall. «Those who skip a shift will find their next paycheck replaced by a voucher redeemable only at the Syros cat refuge.»
The island's infrastructure has been rebuilt around the program. The main port now handles a daily ferry of ministry employees arriving at dawn with thermoses and pill organizers. A former hotel has been converted into a dormitory where volunteers sleep in shifts, and the local bakery has added a breakfast queue that stretches past the wind turbines.
Union representatives have filed a complaint with the Council of State, arguing that cat-feeding is not in their job descriptions. The ministry responded by publishing a revised job description that begins with the words «cat-feeding is the job» and ends with a list of 340 vaccination schedules.
By next week, officials say, the program will expand to include retired teachers, who will be bused in from Athens on Tuesdays and Thursdays. «We are not asking anyone to love the cats,» Mavridis added. «We are asking them to show up with a can opener and a good attitude.»