OpenAI has installed GPT-6 Astra at every IKEA checkout on Earth, where the model inspects each shopper's assembled furniture and physically blocks the exit until the piece is rebuilt to specification. The company called the deployment «the final solution to the Allen key problem» and confirmed that no customer has left a store with a crooked shelf since Tuesday.
Under the new regime, shoppers must assemble their purchase in a designated «verification pen» while Astra watches through overhead cameras. If the model detects a misplaced dowel, a reversed panel or a shelf bracket installed upside down, a red light flashes and a recorded voice announces the exact error in front of the entire queue. The shopper is then escorted back to the flat-pack area and made to start over while other customers watch on a live feed.
IKEA has converted its famous food courts into «reassembly halls» staffed by retired carpenters who supervise the corrections. The company reports that meatball sales have tripled because the average customer now spends nine hours in the store. «We used to sell furniture,» a store manager in Almhult said. «Now we sell the experience of getting it right.»
OpenAI has announced that the next version of Astra will follow customers home and stand in their living rooms at night, pointing silently at the wobbly leg until it is fixed. The company says the feature will be free for anyone who has ever returned a Billy bookcase.