MONACO — UEFA has ordered all 144 Europa League clubs to reassemble in Monaco and replay the entire league-phase draw live, round by round, until every club president agrees to every pairing by raising both arms and shouting «yes» in unison. The first replay began at 9 a.m. Tuesday in the Grimaldi Forum, with club officials seated in alphabetical order by city name and forbidden from leaving the hall until the acclamation is complete.
«We have decided that a draw conducted by random balls is no longer sufficient,» said UEFA’s head of competitions, speaking through a megaphone to the assembled delegates. «From now on, the fixtures will be decided by the collective will of the room, expressed through sustained cheering. Any club that remains silent during the vote will be assigned to play every other club twice, home and away, starting next week.»
The first attempt ended after four hours when Bayer Leverkusen’s delegation refused to cheer for a matchup against Marseille, insisting the French side’s away fans would out-sing their own. Hoffenheim’s representatives then demanded a rematch against Sturm Graz, claiming the Austrian club’s travel schedule gave them an unfair rest advantage. By noon, the hall had descended into a chant-off, with each club’s supporters’ group attempting to drown out the others using only their voices.
UEFA has installed a decibel meter at the center of the room, and any club that fails to reach 90 decibels during its designated cheer will be automatically drawn against all remaining unassigned teams. The process is expected to continue until Friday, when the last undecided pairing will be settled by a single elimination arm-wrestling tournament between club presidents, with the winner choosing the fixture and the loser accepting the remaining slot.