CHERRY RIDGE — Facing a lawsuit over traffic, noise and light pollution from its annual Christmas light extravaganza, the town council has voted to double every household's display and station a uniformed municipal elf on each rooftop to monitor wattage around the clock.
The elves, recruited from the volunteer fire department and issued regulation green tunics with reflective striping, work in eight-hour shifts and carry clipboards for logging bulb counts. «We considered dimming the town,» said council chairwoman Darlene Whitcomb, «but then we realized the lawsuit was really a challenge, and Cherry Ridge has never backed down from a challenge.»
Residents who fail to meet the new minimum — described by officials as «enough lights that the neighbors can read by them» — are visited by a second elf, who stands on the lawn and rings a handbell until compliance is achieved. The town has already purchased a surplus decommissioned school bus to shuttle elves between rooftops and converted the community center into an elf staging depot, where tunics are pressed and clipboards sharpened nightly.
The feud between the Costa and Moreno families has escalated in parallel, with both households now running extension cords across the property line and hiring separate electricians who refuse to speak to each other. Jasmine Costa, a local teenager, has been appointed unofficial festival marshal and spends her evenings patrolling the block in a reflective vest, checking that no rooftop elf has fallen asleep.
By next week, officials say, the elves will be issued whistles, and the town will begin rehearsing a synchronized blackout drill in case the lawsuit succeeds.