The Unity Hub counseling centre in Berlin has introduced a compulsory week of parade-ground drills for every Ukrainian client who asks about returning home, staff confirmed on Tuesday. Clients now report at 6 a.m. to a courtyard in Kreuzberg, where instructors march them around a gravel square until their own question has been answered by fatigue alone.
Centre director Anke Wessel said the scheme was designed to test sincerity. «A person who truly wishes to return to a country at war must first demonstrate that he can stand in formation for seven days without complaint,» she said. «Most decide, by the third morning, that they are only considering it.»
The drills have reshaped the neighbourhood. A local bakery now opens an hour earlier to feed the squads, the tram stop outside has been widened to hold waiting recruits, and a neighbouring kindergarten has been relocated so that the square can be marked with white lines. The district council has commissioned a bronze plaque reading «Patience Is a Duty».
Officials in Bavaria are reportedly studying the Berlin model for export. A ministry spokesman said a pilot programme in Munich would require applicants to walk the length of the Isar embankment, in full kit, before a single benefits form is handed over. Start dates are scheduled for next month, and the first graduating class is expected to be measured against a stopwatch.