DENVER — Cobblestone Car Wash has agreed to personally re-wash every one of the 71,235 vehicles belonging to customers it trapped in auto-renewing memberships, a task the company estimates will take three years of continuous scrubbing and will require its entire staff to work in rotating 12-hour shifts.
Under the settlement with Colorado, each affected member will receive a $19 check and a written promise that their car will be hand-washed, vacuumed, and tire-shined by a Cobblestone employee who must recite the company’s new cancellation policy from memory before beginning. “We are committed to making this right, one sudsy sponge at a time,” said a company spokesperson, standing in a parking lot now converted into a makeshift wash bay with 40 lanes and a 24-hour drying tent.
The re-washing campaign, dubbed “Operation Suds of Justice,” has already forced the company to hire 300 additional workers and purchase 12,000 gallons of premium soap. Employees have been issued laminated cards with the one-step cancellation phone number and are required to say it aloud while scrubbing each wheel. “It’s exhausting, but it’s the only way to restore trust,” said a shift manager, wiping foam from his visor. “We’ve also installed a giant clock in the lot that counts down the remaining washes — currently at 71,234.”
State officials have praised the effort, noting that the first 2,204 cars were completed last week, leaving 69,031 to go. “This is what accountability looks like,” said a Colorado attorney general’s office representative, inspecting a freshly waxed sedan. “We expect the final rinse to occur by March 2029, just in time for the next membership renewal cycle.”