FAYETTEVILLE, Ark. — Arkansas basketball coach John Calipari announced Thursday that his entire roster will assume all coaching duties for the upcoming season, effective immediately, because nine players earn more than his assistants and therefore, in his words, «should be the ones yelling.»
The assistants have been reassigned to the end of the bench, where they will hold towels and track minutes on a whiteboard. Calipari will remain head coach but will no longer speak during practice, communicating only through a series of hand signals he developed over the summer. Players will run film sessions, design inbound plays, and decide who starts, based on a rotating schedule posted in the locker room.
«If they make more than the staff, they should work more than the staff,» Calipari said, standing beside a dry-erase board covered in his own handwriting. «I told the assistants to bring their checkbooks if they want a say. We are not one of the highest payers, so we have to be one of the hardest-working rosters.»
The university has already converted the coaches' offices into a players' lounge with a smoothie bar and a nap room. Recruits on official visits are now greeted by a point guard who delivers the program's academic pitch. Calipari said he expects the arrangement to spread across college athletics by next season, adding that he has already fielded calls from three athletic directors asking how to install a similar system. «The players are getting more than the coaches,» he said. «I just don't understand who could be against it.»